Brexit worries, coping with uncertainty

It has been a tumultuous couple of weeks. Not only has there been a split in the country, there has also been a split in both the major political parties. Many people are feeling worried and anxious about an uncertain future, and you may be wondering if there is anything you can do about it?

The disaster narrative

The other day I went into the doctors, and the receptionist asked me, "Are you over it yet?" I innocently said, "Over what?" The conversation that followed was about how Brexit was going to be a complete disaster. 

So is it going to be a complete disaster? As far as I can tell, the general opinion seems to be that no one is really sure what will happen, however there are likely to be some negative effects on our economy, and we may have a recession. Most other things will stay much the same.

People who have experienced a bereavement often talk about the feeling of dread they have about upcoming anniversaries, such as Christmas, Birthdays, and Wedding Anniversaries. Very often the actual day is not as bad as they expected. It tends to be more of mix.

So why does this happen?

It's because we have two basic brain systems which work together,

• Emotional Brain Our emotional brain is fast, and it treats everything as though it is happening right here, right now. It doesn't know what the future is.

• Thinking Brain Thinking brain is slow, and generally spends its time thinking about the future. It often spends its time worrying.

Worry is a creative process, where you imagine some negative future event. 

Your Emotional Brain reacts to this as though it was actually happening, and helps to get your body ready to deal with the threat you are imagining. This is why when you worry you feel panicky, tense, irritable, or on edge. 

When we worry we are usually doing something known as ruminating - this is where we chew a worry over and over. Often this involves the "what about" worry, where we try to imagine every possible eventuality. Very few of these "what about's" are likely to ever happen. 

Our Emotional Brain reacts to worry as though they were real events happening right now - whatever you imagine, Emotional Brain reacts to it. The problem for your emotional system is that the event you are reacting to is unresolvable, because it isn't happening. In the case of Brexit, the actual effects will not be felt for weeks, or months, and some of them not for years. This is a very long time for you to be in a high state of alert.

Uncertainty is even more difficult for your Thinking and Emotional Brain to respond to. Thinking Brain can't resolve the problem because it doesn't know what the problem is. Emotional Brain gets set on high alert, but is unable to create any meaningful response.  

Coping with uncertainty

There are several things which can help, 

• Avoid 'worry' triggers  Try to avoid reading, or watching the news. Make a pact with people you know not to talk about it.  Newspapers, TV, and talking about Brexit can often be another form of ruminating. The newspaper I follow has produced a steady stream of speculative articles, which are really an electronic version of ruminating.   

• Do something constructive Your Emotional Brain is trying to create some directed behaviour to reduce the threat. Doing something in response, even if it is just going for a walk, will help your Emotional Brain to discharge the feeling of anxiety.

• Be kind to yourself  If you are worrying, use a calming voice to reassure yourself. Using the voice of someone you know, who you feel safe and reassured by can increase its effectiveness.

• Affirmative statements  It may sound strange, but standing in front of a mirror, and saying an affirmative statement to yourself such as "I will be OK," or "I can cope," "I am safe," can be helpful.  Using a mirror gives you a sense that it is being said to you, rather than you just saying it to yourself, which can help make the statement more powerful. Note it is not necessary for you to believe your affirmative statement, only that you say it.

• Focus on the here and now Do something which absorbs your attention. My article on Zen & the art of colouring suggests some other activities that are like adult colouring, which you may prefer. You may also find Mindfulness practice helpful.

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• Reframe language Using the words "crisis, disaster, catastrophe, or calamity" will create a stronger response in your Emotional Brain. These words contain threats to our survival, and require a panic response. So use less emotive words, such as "upset, problem, difficulty, or challenge." These words also contain possible responses - problems can be solved, upset will calm, challenges can be faced, difficulties can be overcome. 

• Don't make any big decisions When we are anxious we tend to move into survival mode. In this mode, our bodies are primed to make snap decisions based on small amounts of information. In survival mode you are making an emotional decision not a rational one. One of the common things I have heard people say is that they will emigrate. This is a big decision. It's a decision which is best made when you are calm, so you can properly weigh up whether it's right for you. 

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title image by ​stux